Critique Contest Entry! The Kiss Off First Line

To help D4EO agent extraordinaire Weronika Janczuk celebrate her birthday, Brenda Drake of Brenda Drake Writes...under the influence of coffee and Weronika have teamed up and are holding a First Lines contest - the prize is a manuscript critique from Weronika and who DOESN'T want a professional critique?


My finished manuscript is a YA Contemporary called The Kiss Off.


SYNOPSIS

Poppy writes a scathing song, ‘The Kiss Off’ about her ex-boyfriend Cam and ex-good friend Nikki, the boyfriend stealer. She uploads it to YouTube, where it catches the attention of Ty, the lead singer of a local band. With this song, his band skyrockets to the top of the charts and into the public eye, bringing Poppy's emotional dirty laundry with it.

FIRST LINE

‘What rhymes with “douchebag”?’ I asked as one of my best friends Vanya turned knobs and pulled the legs out on the tripod. 


Okay, have at it, contestants and others who have an opinion! 


And Weronika, may I say...

Sairz